Moments of Bliss

I have been going to a chiropractor for a few years now as part of my goal to take care of my body. Recently that activity brought with it an unexpected moment of bliss. While I was travelling to my appointment I made arrangements to visit a friend who also had an appointment in that small town. She lives about 10 minutes from that town so we arranged to meet in her backyard at a distance after our appointments. I arrived at her home before she did so I grabbed my book and headed to her backyard.

For fifteen minutes I read in the shade of her wisteria covered pergola, deeply inhaling the lilac scented air wafting my way.

It was heavenly,

a moment of bliss!

My friend and I had a lovely visit. Due to present circumstances, we haven’t seen each other since last summer and it was long overdue. I miss being able to visit with friends. I miss our lingering hugs. Last week, on a Zoom visit, another friend shared that when this is over her son is going to hug people until he can feel the other person’s heart beating. That is the perfect description of the kind of hug I want to give and receive again.

In the past we may have taken our visits with friends and family for granted. I tried not to take them for granted, but I have noticed that when I have seen them over the past year, we feel a greater pull than ever to linger in our hugs. This is such a hard time for many due to the scarcity of human touch. Some of the greatest challenges people with disabilities and older adults feel during “normal” times is the lack of touch by others. That scarcity of touch has been made so much worse by the pandemic. One of the most intimate services I provided to my mom in her last days was when I would “cream her up”, spreading cream on her body to relieve dryness and itching. It was a loving touch that blessed my life as much as it did hers. I also brought her favourite meals and chocolate. We shared many wonderful moments together, not only in her last days, but especially in her last days.

Bliss is often connected with our senses. My moment of bliss under the wisteria vine was a moment of synchronicity for me because my day went very differently than what I had planned. I had planned to drop some papers off where I used to work before I retired, but no one was there. I called someone who worked there, and she was at home. Her home was on my way to my appointment, but she had an appointment earlier than mine. I was able to change my appointment time. I arrived at her home before she did, and thus I had my blissful moment. What a wonderful gift!

In winter I used to have a sweater that I called “my happy place”, a gift from my in-laws. It was a very soft sweater that I wore in the winter when I wanted to be home by the fire but had to go out. That sweater became my happy place because it represented where I wanted to be. Putting it on eased my mind and wearing it provided me with moments of joy in my day. I define joy as “not quite bliss”. Sitting by the fire and drinking hot chocolate is an easy moment of joy creator for me on cold winter days and sometimes these moments of joy become moments of bliss.

So what transforms a moment of joy into a moment of bliss? For me it is a moment of joy during which I take a deep breath and feel that “all is right with the world”.

It is my state of mind in the moment that makes the difference. Okay, so here’s the back story on all that I have described above. I have a mind that works overtime and that used to perseverate over stupid mistakes that I had made. I had nightmares about one particular mistake for over 20 years because I had not forgiven myself for it. Peace only came to me when I forgave myself and moved on. Over time I have made two changes in my life to decrease negative experiences, I have worked hard to not make stupid mistakes and I have worked hard not to be too hard on myself when I do. I forgive myself, learn from my mistakes and move on. None of us are perfect, but we can all learn from our mistakes, forgive ourselves and move on. I experience more joy, and more bliss because I have learned to let go of negative experiences and move on. I know that this is what God would want for all of us, we were made for joy.

What blissful experiences have you had in your life? Share one of them in the comments below.

What brings you joy or bliss? Make a list, and then do an item from your list each day. Finally, reflect on how well your days go when you make room in them for bliss. If you want to take this further have your family members do this activity as well, then share your answers with one another. Perhaps as a family you could build in room for everyone to experience a little joy or bliss each day – how great would that life be?

Velvet

Making room for bliss in my life, one day at a time